Sam's NOT Having It
Sam's NOT Having It is a video directed by, written by and starring Brandon Rogers. The video was released on 15th February 2016, and as of 17th February 2016, has amassed almost 450,000 views. The video has been heavily praised, with users quick to point out the links between the video and others. The video surrounds the life of a man called Sam and his roommate Donna. Plot The video starts with 38-year-young Sam introducing himself and showing the camera man around his house. While touring the house, he shows the camera some of his poses which incorporates items around the house (such as counter-attack, hat-time and pillow-party). As they leave the house, Sam opens the front door to find his elderly roommate, Donna, whom he locked out. Donna, angry at being locked out, rants about Sam's treatment of her. Sam reveals that he has "demons" in his head, but that Jesus is his "helmet". He also shows the camera his collection of stained glass lamps, while Donna states that she collects salmon, which is represented by a speargun. Sam talks about how he used to be a ball-pit supervisor until he quit due to an "hypodermic needle" presumably stabbing him. Back at home, Sam sorts through the mail, revealing that Donna has a parole officer and relies on food stamps. He and Donna get into an alteration with Sam calling Donna an "asshole", and Donna telling the camera that the glass of milk Sam is drinking isn't actually milk. Later, Donna tries to play a card game with Sam, but it is obvious that he doesn't know how to play, mistakingly showing his cards to Donna and dropping his deck. However, Sam gets offended when Donna knocks down the small house he made out of his cards. Sam tells the Camera that in his spare time, he makes workout videos for mentally disabled people, which the audience is shown a series of clips from. He also shows a photograph from his performance for kids with cancer (whom he refers to as "sweet, beautiful orbs"). Meanwhile, back in the house, Donna is seem polishing her speargun collection, and repeating how much she loves the objects, but begins to treat them with sexual pleasure, much to the disgust of Sam Other clips in the video show Sam riding his hoverboard around the city and crashing it when riding around the store. He also rides in between two gay men kissing (Diesel and Kevin, from "Angry Office Christmas Party"), calling out to them that he's "doing God's work". Later, he gets stuck in a rocket kiddie ride, and comments on balloons, Chinese lanterns, and apple kiddie rides being orbs (orbs being an obsession of his, it appears). A series of clips show Sam asking the cameraman to edit out certain clips, including tripping and knocking over a disabled man while riding his hoverboard, falling down the stairs, and accidentally falling head-first into a trash can in the street. The video ends with Sam saying how "average" he is, before eating a leaf from a tree. The credits roll while more clips from Sam's workout video play in the background. Script: (Listen and wrote by: EpicWolf22) Cameraman: So tell us your name. Sam: My name? Well, I’m Sam and I’m 38 years young. Briefly cuts to a Korean company Sam: Excuse me Chinese man. Cuts to Sam and Donna's house Sam: This is my hippity house. I like to do a lot of creative fun poses here. This one’s called “Counter attack”, this one's “Hat Time”, “Pillow party”, “Falling swan”. *Falls on the couch while supposedly breaking one of his balls in the process* Something just popped. Let’s go outside! *opens the door only to find Donna standing there* Donna: ASSHOLE! You locked me out! Sam: This is my roommate Donna. Donna: I slept on a goddamn anthill last night. Feels like I popped open a bottle of Tabasco with my-- Cuts to Sam at the fountain from the beginning Sam: Got a few demons up here, but Jesus is my helmet. Back to the house of the crazy roommates Sam: I like collecting stained glass lamps. So beautiful, beautiful orbs. Donna: I collect salmon. Cuts to a store where Sam is on a hover-board holding baby powder Sam: There’s a 2 for 1 sale on baby powder. *Sam crashes into the shelf* '''Jesus is my helmet! I'm not having it. '''Back to the fountain Cameraman: What was your favorite job? Sam: I was a ball pit supervisor for a good decade. Cameraman: Why did you quit? Sam: Hypodermic needle. Cuts back to the house Sam: Food stamps, parole officer, honey these are all yours. Donna: My name ain’t asshole. Sam: I can’t hear you right now, I’m trying to enjoy my milk. Donna: That’s not milk. Cuts to Sam outside on a hover-board as he sees two dudes kissing Sam: Beep homosexuals, just doing God’s work. Cuts to Sam stuck in...whatever the hell it was Sam: I’m stuck. Oh god, It startin. I’m not having it. Look at these air orbs. Back to the house, Sam and Donna are playing cards Donna: Put it down there, no the other way. Turn it over. Jesus! Sam: My house has a two car garage. *Donna knocks over Sam's card house* '''...The only thing you're hurting are my feelings. '''Back at the store Sam: This thing is acting all fancy pants. I can’t hold it. Oh god here we go, I’m not having it. Too many orbs happening here. Look at this apple! It’s a large orb. Briefly cuts back to the house Donna: How do you get this coffee to taste like monkey piss? Sam: I use your panties as a goddamn filter. Donna looks back at her coffee in shock Sam: In my free time, I like to make motivational workout videos for young retarded's. -Watch me lift and punch this sack, my disabilities can’t hold me back!- *shows a picture of him with cancer diagnosed kids* '''This is when I performed for kids with cancer's, all of them: Sweet beautiful orbs. '''At some sort of diner Waiter: Milkshake? Sam: I’m not going to have it. Back at the house, Donna is cleaning her guns Donna: I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you so much, ahh, ahh *cocks her gun while Sam is just standing near Donna with his ears plugged* Sam: Every Sunday... Cuts to Sam outside on the hover-board Sam: The key to life is to smile every single day. *bumps into a handicapped guy* 'Could we edit that last part out please? '*shows Sam in different accidents* '''Can we edit out what just happened? Just that last bit. Delete what just happened. '''Back to Hover-board Sam Sam: I’m just your average straight guy. *Eats from a plant as the video ends with his exercise video* Credits * Sam - Brandon Rogers * Donna - Paulette Jones * Cameraman - Gabriel Gonzalez * Gay Men * Director - Brandon Rogers * Writer - Brandon Rogers * Cameraman - Gabriel Gonzalez * Acknowledgements - Adam Neylan, Stephen James, Ricky Luna, David Burton Trivia * Donna was mentioned off screen as Mom's neighbor in A Day With Mom. This also makes Sam one of her neighbors. * The video doesn't have a "Subscribe to Brandon Rogers or..." screen at the end of the video, which is commonly seen in many of his videos. * There are two counts of technical mistakes where the audio can be heard stuttering in the video. ** However, as Sam mentioned quitting his ball pit supervisor job from a needle, it's speculated these aren't errors. * After Donna knocks down Sam's house of cards, she can be seen breaking character by laughing when Sam says his feelings are hurt. Category:Videos